Food-Eating Battle Monkeys

[zotz]

feiblepint is a Brain-Eating Pirate Monkey ...with a Battle Rating of 9.9 To see if your Food-Eating Battle Monkey can defeat feiblepint, enter your name:

Comments

[zoo-music-girl.livejournal.com]

Bah. You're kicking the crap out of me. *off to try Mel's*

[zotz]

Mel's monkey slaughtered quite a few of mine before I found that one. I'm quite proud of her.

[sheepthief.livejournal.com]

Isn't it strange.

I've just gotten over the laughing.

Here we are, a group of highly intelligent people, and what are we doing? We're pitting Jozafiend the Haggis-Eating Ninja Monkey against Arsebiscuit the Beef-Eating Pirate Monkey.

Now I ask you - is it any wonder the world is as fucked up as it is?

[zotz]

If only we could persuade the world's leaders to take out their frustrations this way . . .

[wechsler.livejournal.com]

dubya is a Pizza-Eating Proboscis Monkey with a Battle Rating of 3.9

[zotz]

Like we needed a computer to tell us this?

[wechsler.livejournal.com]

It's more precise that way ;)

[zotz]

Saddam is a Toast-Eating Attack Monkey with a Battle Rating of 6.9.

Tony is a Tripe-Eating Skeleton Monkey with a Battle Rating of 3.3.

dubya is a Pizza-Eating Proboscis Monkey with a Battle Rating of 3.9

So it looks like Saddam's going down - but not by much.

[zotz]

Chirac, incidentally, is a Man-Eating Killer Monkey with a Battle Rating of 8.5.

[karmicnull.livejournal.com]

Your monkey is bloody hard. I'm not messing with him.

[araqnid.livejournal.com]

You must have been trying for ages to find one with 9.9 :) I tried for a while to get one with 9.7....

(and managed to come up with three scoring 0.0 on the way)

[zotz]

And were they cheese-eating surrender monkeys?

It took a few minutes. What we really need to do is crack the site to find their algorithm, of course. Then we could build the perfect attack monkey, and the world wold be ours . . .

[dennyd.livejournal.com]

Well, you're only .1 off of perfect, that should keep you fairly safe.

Incidentally, Denny is a sausage-eating surrender monkey with a Battle Rating of 0.0

...figures.

[zotz]

That's definitely TMI, thanks.

[dennyd.livejournal.com]

*blinks* That interpretation hadn't occurred to me

*grins*

[bugshaw.livejournal.com]

bugshaw is a Mushroom-Eating Sea Monkey with a Battle Rating of 1.6

Very feeble, but I kind of like it.

[zoo-music-girl.livejournal.com]

"zoomusicgirl is a Purple People-Eating Spider Monkey with a Battle Rating of 8.4."

That's a bit better I suppose.

[duranorak.livejournal.com]

~blinks~ Grief. Even I had. Do keep up. :)

E.
x

[zotz]

Mushroom is food of Gods. Monkey eat mushroom, monkey be mighty real soon.

[yehoshua.livejournal.com]

Typical. Gilligan, my Man-Eating Assassin Monkey (battle rating 9.7) is still second-banana, at best. I'm going to have to go abuse a bunch of graduate students to make myself feel better.

[zotz]

What was your previous monkey like?

[zotz]

Ah. This is a cultural reference towards a TV series which has never been shown in the UK, isn't it?

Is it as bad as people generally imply?

[zoo-music-girl.livejournal.com]

4.5 or something equally sad. It was called kingink but I can't remember what it ate.

[araqnid.livejournal.com]

i live for turnips	0.0	Garlic-Eating Surrender Monkey
crack me open	0.0	Garlic-Eating Surrender Monkey
purgatory tunnel rat	0.0	Bug-Eating Surrender Monkey

One approach would be that if you just keep adding "spam" on the end, you'll get a high score eventually... e.g., "spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam" is a 9.2.

Also, "i need crack" is a 9.3

[dennyd.livejournal.com]

I happen to be slightly distracted today. So there.

shiny!

[yehoshua.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure. I haven't seen it since I was about ten years old, at which point I thought it was high cultural fare. It did waste a couple of actors who had done some pretty good work elsewhere (notably Jim Backus, who, in addition to loads of stage work, once featured in a film called (sit down for this) "Zotz!"). I don't think it was ever designed to be more than escapist drivel, and on that level it succeeds marvelously.

[ex-wendles389.livejournal.com]

um, how do you know it's a her?

I was intrigued by one of the pop-up ads which had no pictures and solely said something like
Visit the most irritating website in the world!
Click here!
I didn't click on it, but I did google it and ended up here (http://www.thebrainstrust.co.uk/) of all places.

[badasstronaut.livejournal.com]

I think mushrooms are great but some people think they are evil.

[jinty]

Apparently, Granny (a Brain-Eating Death Monkey) can beat them all and your feiblepint too. Courtesy of badasstronaut...

[ex-wendles389.livejournal.com]

Mushroom is food of Gods

Indeed.

And I just thought you should know that one of my lot just got a Haggis-Eating Fez Monkey.

[dennyd.livejournal.com]

Bowbow
the
Brain-Eating Death Monkey

Battle Rating : 10.0

(I found him in someone else's journal)