A student must die.

[zotz]

He's left the room with his phone left in his coat poclet. It's got that frog ringtone. He dies or the phone does. I haven't decided which yet.

Comments

[fluffymormegil.livejournal.com]

Embrace the power of AND.

[nisaba.livejournal.com]

In the time it took you to write this post, you could have thrown the phone out of the nearest window.

Who said frogs can't fly?

[inulro.livejournal.com]

Quite. All in the interests of science, of course.

[zotz]

There's one major problem here - this room has no windows.

[fluffymormegil.livejournal.com]

More specifically: Impel the phone down his throat so hard it comes out of his arse. Sideways.

[solipsistnation.livejournal.com]

Smash the phone and then put it carefully back in the coat pocket (ideally leaving no trace of the phone-smashing outside of the pocket.

Attempt to keep a straight face when he returns, puts his coat on, and leaves.

[zotz]

Tempting. very tempting.

[randomchris.livejournal.com]

The obvious: answer the phone.

Failing that, move it to the corridor outside, and let natural selection take its course as it gets moved further and further from its starting point. Or possibly goes on a random walk.

[zotz]

answer the phone

The direct approach. Might work, yes.

[http://users.livejournal.com/puzzle_/]

Kill them all!

Oh and is it just me or if that frog's cock just ever so slightly disturbing!

[zotz]

The idea that you've noticed the frog having a cock is certainly quite disturbing.

[purplerabbits.livejournal.com]

Not as disturbing as the udder of the Boddingtons cow, who had a male voice and kept swinging it around as if it was a particularly impressive scrotum...

[ciphergoth.livejournal.com]

Open up the phone and place a small piece of paper across the battery contacts, then replace.

[ciphergoth.livejournal.com]

For extra points, write "fuck you asshole" on the piece of paper.

[dmh.livejournal.com]

Don't take it out on the phone, it's not the phones fault.

[zotz]

Bleeding-heart bloody liberals. The phone had it coming. Begging for it, it was.

[aca.livejournal.com]

When previously working in an open plan office I seriously considered a mobile phone sin bin. A small, correctly sized, faraday cage which, when the phone is dropped inside, cuts it off from it's base station and renders the office tranquilly quiet once more.

As an alternative turn the phone off and leave this on their monitor.

[zotz]

That had actually occurred to me as well.

Thanks for the notice. May come in very handy.

[fellcat.livejournal.com]

The last time I saw a Jamster ad in the TV paper, they were proudly describing the frog as the most annoying tone! and seemed to be using its annoyingness as a selling point. I despair of human nature.

[aca.livejournal.com]

The creature was originally entitled "Annoying Thing" and was just an entry in some German artist's CGI portfolio. He, it would seem, is doing quite well out of our suffering now.

http://www.turboforce3d.com/annoying/

[swisstone.livejournal.com]

I'm astonished anyone has it - I've only ever heard it on the television.

[nmg.livejournal.com]

Likewise (and I thought it quite jolly as well)

[thepaintedone.livejournal.com]

1. Switch it off and/or remove the battery.
2. donate the phone to one of those chairties that ask for old handsets
3. Beat the user to death with any handy implement for the sake of humanity.

[feanelwa.livejournal.com]

Pour coca-cola in his pocket, then you can say somebody else did it because you're boycotting coke. Obviously this has the fatal flaw that you'd have to steal the coke in order to remain boycotting it, unless you use a different brand of phosphoric acid + caramel.

[feanelwa.livejournal.com]

Alternatively you could wait until he comes back and sing Carrots Handbags Cheese in a loud voice over and over until he goes away.

[feanelwa.livejournal.com]

Or you could always change the ringtone to a simple "ring ring" and delete the frog one from the phone's memory.

[zotz]

That's a very practical answer. I'd probably have to torture him as well, just for revenge and/or kicks.

[sibelian.livejournal.com]

Give his mobile number to as many of those automated dialler scams in the States as you can get and make sure it's on every cold-call list in every call centre in the country. Cold callers and The States don't usually phone until evening so YOU would be safe from the noise.

The ringtone won't last for very long.

[zotz]

So do they call mobiles? It would be cruel but amusing to do that if so.

[sibelian.livejournal.com]

Or you could invite him on a trip to the seaside and get one of your mates to phone him so that you could pull the phone out his hand just as he answers and throw it into the sea. That would be the one *I* would find most satisfying.

[easterbunny.livejournal.com]

Find out his mobile number. Send him out of the room for just a few minutes and surreptitiously place superglue on the phone. Call the phone as he walks back in. Or fill up his answering service with messages from Sweetie the Chicken.

[naturalbornkaos.livejournal.com]

Why not don the Zorro mask, the lycra pants and the tight top with the "J" on it, assuming your long-lost ukpg secret identity of "JAMMERMAN"!??

[shaunotd.livejournal.com]

So.............what did you do then?